Why Simple Loving Truth?
It turns out that many therapists have a saying or mantra. I didn’t really see the necessity for this until I stumbled upon mine, which is to live your “simple, loving, truth.” Having a therapeutic mantra felt a little corny to me, but I found that the mantra my therapist uses really resonated with me. Then, one day in my own personal therapy, I was discussing difficulties I was having expressing myself to someone I care about. While processing through this with my therapist, it donned on me that I really should be able to say whatever I need to say to people if I’m just expressing my simple, loving truth. My therapist responded warmly that this could be my mantra. I chewed on that and I liked it, but didn’t realize how helpful it could be.
Over the next several months, I slowly learned how valuable reminding myself of this was and I gradually became better and less fearful at expressing myself to others. It seems that those three words effectively addressed every fear I had with speaking up:
Simple– When we’re stuck in fear, we over complicate situations and how to resolve them. If we simplify it in our minds and keep it that way as we verbalize out needs/concerns, it’s going to be received better.
Loving– When we don’t say what we need to say because we’re afraid of hurting someone’s feelings, you know that what you need to share isn’t with the intent of hurting them. Speak from that love…simply. The message comes out differently when you’re speaking from that more vulnerable, loving place and it’s heard differently as well.
Truth– Fear can keep us from being honest about what we need to say, how we say it, or why we’re saying it. Essentially, we distort our message and lie in order to feel better about what we need to communicate. This leaves us behaving inauthentically, which is counterproductive to healthy living and healthy relationships.
Try it out yourself! The key is you must use this with yourself before practicing it with others. If your internal dialogue is overly complex, unloving, and not honest, you can’t expect to communicate this way outwardly. I like to think of it as more of a way of living authentically rather than a way of communicating. I’d love to hear feedback.
There isn’t any message that you can’t express if you’re speaking from your simple, loving truth.